metal: you either get it, or you don't

i paid twice to see a metal documentary and i don't even care. metal: a headbanger's journey was so fucking worth the extra cash. sam dunn tells his life's story concerning metal, exploring themes such as religion, gender while touching on roots, history and exploring subgenres.sam dunn, the filmmaker, is an anthriopologist and i'm glad to see him using anthropology for metallic purposes. i should be doing it. perhaps he could use someone to feed him sandwiches or make his bed. sam's film made me smile, shiver, shake, get hot, wonder, lose my voice, cackle, tingle, choke up, nod, headbang, reminisce, tap my feet, feel proud, do a lot of introspection, and give him my "i'm fucking metal" button. he suggested that when one loses their inner 15 year-old, then metal no longer makes sense. i'm inclined to agree, as it's something no metal fan i know has shirked. metal spoke to me the first time i heard it-- hearing random metal on cbc radio and wishing i was a rock star, making a flying v-esque guitar from a piece of chipboard, and a headband from an old underwear elastic. my first exposure to a specific band was a glam metal one: poison in grade seven, upon recommendation from my boyfriend. it saved me from my wussy rap phase (not that rap is wussy, but wussy rap). my next source of metal was my best friend's older brother, who was basically into ac/dc, motorhead and metallica. i got a couple of tapes from him, and laid listening to them in bed with the lights off thinking about my horrible life, allowing metal to cover me in a warm dark cloak, letting me know there were others (who read metal edge magazine) who were just as shittily off as me. and then ozzy (who i hated for a week -- and one week only). soon metallica took me through high school, then white zombie and black sabbath and slayer and and and and... i painted ( i mean my mom painted) my room black and i liked boys with long hair and mom asked me why i didn't like things that other girls liked and if my poems meant i was going to kill myself and i'd finally found a genre of music that spoke to my nonconformity and dark leanings. i've not looked back. it's pretty much metal for life. it's just proggier, darker, more bizarre and closer to europe. as sam mentioned in the film, he's never met anyone who liked slayer "for a summer." it doesn't really work that way. you like metal and you have friends who like metal and if you see a dude on the street who likes metal you can nod or want to nod or you know inside that a nod was implied. metal crowds are my favourite, because they're kind and polite. it's the fucking pop crowd who're assholes. not so much the local indie pop crowd, but the kids who come out to see whoever's on the cover of the coast. those kids can suck eggs and eat shit and get drunk on someone else's watch. i could say a thousand words, i could keep metlin' 'til we're black sabbath in the face-- but it's for me to know, and for you to find out: metal just is.