Saturday, April 08, 2006

when will i get my period?*

someday your vagina will drip blood. and you will be fertile. and have to plug your vag or put something under your fleshy rouge tap to catch the leak. you may be plagued with PMS, with stained panties, and your brother making fun of tampons. you won't be able to have sex without getting blood everywhere, yet you'll probably sharve for sex even more. you will feel dirty. sexy. mad. it will last for forty years or something. bleeding's end will be hell unless you eat soy. you will tell your mom you're going on the pill to control aunt flo. but really you're on the fuck. your mom will give you a pamphlet about your changing body. maybe she'll take you out for pizza for becoming a woman. or give you pearl earrings. or hug you. or hit you. or tell you stories about teen pregnancy that will scar you or inspire you or that you will turn into. whatever you do don't worry if it hasn't come yet. it will come to you in time. unexpected. at school while wearing white pants (after labour day! gasp!) at church. while you're touching yourself. in your sleep. you're not dying-- you're becoming a woman. in some countries you're sent away to a hut-- you: the unclean. enjoy the days of the clean vagina. of the fearless fuck. of the days of childhood dreams that you'll fuck away. you'll be 8. you'll be 18. you'll get it sometime. don't be hasty. get off the net and spemd the entire day reading anne of green gables under a shady tree and remember back on this day when the world asks too much of you.
*this question is probaby the single-most queried by (presumably) girls who end up here at my period. here's an answer for all the curious youngsters who'd rather ask the internet than their mothers, and whose teachers have not addressed it at school.
$$$ all this and i'm not even menstruating.

2 comments:

ling-ling san said...

this is excellent. "my period" is again, about periods. a subject that, although i know nothing about, occasionally will sing songs about.

soon i hope to record a new dirty about periods. it was similar to your new title.

i didn't get my period YET
did my vagina just forGET
...

anyway, i'm working on it.

lucifuge said...

if i'd never chosen this name, my period (inspired, of course, by a dirties song), for my title, i'd've never had a consistent focus on menstruation. it actually happened because of my stats. if you need any collaboration on period songs, i am here-- blood and all. i dig the newie, by the way.