ailing vomit

what the christ? what the christ? what the serious christ is up? men's fitness magazine named houston the fattest city in the US three years running. ok, fine. cool. no real surprise. so houston launches a civic fitness program called get lean houston and mcdonald's is the official restaurant sponsor. they're gonna be offering chicken sandwiches, salads and a veggie burger at each of houston's 253 mcdonald's outlets (which are reported to not be linked to houston's obesity epidemic). good. nice. now houston is thin because WHAT THE FUCK? stop eating at mcdonald's. don't eat the caesar salad (saltiest menu item, even tho it's featured on their healthy chouces menu). don't eat the veggie burgers (second saltiest menu item, also conveniently placed on the healthy choices menu). the fries (cooked SOMETIMES in vegetable fat, sometimes in beef fat, depending on their fancy). the fucking orange drink (shudder). the treat of the week (if they still have those) or the revolting disney toy would be less damaging to your body than the so- called food served there. you'd even be better off choking to death on the bag the toy came in than eating yourself to a slow death from your choice of cancer, or your arteries slowly hardening and closing in on themselves. seriously, consider it. listen, i'm not suggesting you prepare a six-course raw vegan meal when you're sharvin' for it (altho i would indeed be impressed). order a fresh pizza. make a grilled cheese sandwich. eat a bag of samosas. live a little if you're feelin' it. just don't give those corporate cockfuckers one more penny. if you haven't watched supersize me or read fast food nation-- do it. if you have and are still eating at mcdonald's, crack your head on the sidewalk. this revolting drivel they sell is unworthy to be called food because it isn't. it's totally and utterly damaging and if you pause long enough to taste it, it's horrific-- really, it is. admit it. mcdonald's.... fuck. you already know. thank you, maddox, for pointing out that mcdonald's new slogan is an anagram for ailing vomit. i'm lovin' that.